I found these in different places and assume they're different men...yet somehow they seem strangely similar. And I do mean strangely similar.
Category: Sexual Strangeness
Posted on 8/2/2008 9:32:40 AM by Gloria Brame
Wonderful beautiful astonishing sea dragons
News that an endangered species of sea dragon is pregnant at the Georgia Aquarium caught my eye. Seems it is only the third time that a sea dragon living in captivity in the US has gotten pregnant. Of particular interest: it's the male sea dragon who gets pregnant, carrying the tiny eggs around until they hatch.
But what completely blew me is the sea dragon itself. I've seen plenty of sea-horses but never anything as amazing as this.
First, an image of the expectant father, a "common" weedy sea dragon. Those little pink dots are his brood:
Weedy sea dragons, probably complaining about always feeling too tired for sex:
And if those images aren't wondrous enough for you, check out the rarer cousin of the weedy -- the leafy sea dragon. Stand back.
I get the COOLEST stuff in email sometimes! This beautifully evocative image recently arrivedl from the artist himself, Ryan J. Vojir. Thanks, Ryan! More, more, more! :)
Category: Sex and Arts
Posted on 8/1/2008 1:32:46 PM by Gloria Brame
World's oldest recorded joke
I gather there was a lot of lap-farting among the ancient Sumerians:
"Something which has never occurred since time immemorial; a young woman did not fart in her husband's lap."
Read more ha-ha's from the ancient world: World's oldest joke traced back to 1900 BC.
Is it real or photoshop? A tattoo or just body paint? Whatever it is, it's extraordinarily beautiful.
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I keep seeing these commercials for an NBC reality show called "The Baby Borrowers." I have NOT watched the show but from the trailers, I get the basic concept: a bunch of teens are compelled to try taking care of little babies to see if they're as ready for parenthood as they might think they are.
The commercial clips show teens having hissy fits, screaming, slamming doors, and everything else you expect these days from a reality show featuring immature people.
But...WHAT ABOUT THE BABIES?
I can't stop wondering who in the world would "donate" their baby to this ludicrous project and let a toddler or infant be exposed to all that screaming and drama? When the original show aired in England, there was considerable protest about how the babies were treated, and though producers assured watchers the parents had consented and nannies were overseeing it, the fact is...the babies were still being exposed to hysteria and, at times, not treated very well (left to cry, and so on). In other words (and I know you will find this shocking), the TV producers lied.
The American press has been hailing the new series as a deterrant to teen pregnancy, and even the L.A. Times has praised it as a kind of collective schadenfreude for women over 30 who get to gloat over how incompetent beautiful young teens are at baby-raising. I've yet to see people in the American press deal with the issue that the babies being used for this utterly stupid and pointless experiment (what? like we didn't already know teenagers shouldn't have babies?) may grow up TRAUMATIZED from some of these experiences!
WTF??
I just hope there's a clause in those babies' contracts to provide for all the therapy they're going to need 20-30 years from now when they want to know why their parents put them in harm's way for the sake of a tv show.
What kind of a strange world do we live in where the normal small afflictions of the body are so embarrassing to adults that they can't bear buying remedies at the store? Such inhibitions and sensitivity about the body are extremely normal when you're a teen but it seems that there are plenty of adults who are so embarrassed about shopping for sanitary napkins, hemorrhoid ointments, wart removers, even eyebrow tweezers(!), that some entrepreneurs have targeted them as a market niche. (And btw, my favorite of their products has to be the one that allegedly makes your farts smell better. Ummmm...)
Ergo, a thriving business that caters to adults who don't want anyone to know that they need so-called Embarrassing Products.
Because, of course, if we found out they needed them, we'd know their big embarrassing secret: they're human!
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Category: Sex and Culture
Posted on 7/31/2008 5:43:55 PM by Gloria Brame
Cobbled up dildo
I've still got some select freaky footwear images left over my last week's shoe fetish extravaganza, so expect to see some more this week from my depraved collection.
Not quite sure what to say about this one, nor do I know if it's something that a model wore or, again, just a flight of fantasy by some fetishistic footwear designer....
Debbie Harry, or do they know when they show the camel-toe?
Found this nostalgic image of Ms. Harry the other day, and couldn't miss that camel toe.
...which prompted me to wonder, albeit briefly, "did she realize how those pants looked?" VERY briefly because on reflection, it seems almost impossible that she would not have known she was presenting a pretty little pucker-package in those pudenda-hugging pants, particularly since she is a total SEX GODDESS.
...which prompted me to similarly briefly wonder, "do all women know when they're doing that?" The unbearably hot young women who wear vulva-licious pants, the fat old ladies whose unfortunate stretch pants give you too much information about the birthing process, the office ladies whose choice of business pants make you think they're in an illegal business....do they all know when they're giving toe?
Personally, when I dress I glance up and down to make sure that things I don't want to show aren't showing. Buttons, zippers, neck-line, panty-lines, bra-straps and, yes, labia lips and legs all get a cursory glance. I even throw in a few ass-looks just to be sure that everything's looking fine (or at least as I remember it).
I accept that some people never glance in the mirror when they get dressed or before they leave the house. I even accept that some people will stare only at their faces in a mirror and avoid looking at the rest. And then there are those about whom one can only sadly shake one's heads and wonder, "what were they thinking when they got dressed today?"
But still: is it possible to wear something stretchy that hugs your crotch tight, and then wear a top that doesn't cover it, and NOT know you're exposed? Never mind the pants that kind of creep and crawl up on you, so you find yourself constantly tugging at the thighs: is it possible NOT to realize when your vulva's wrapped tight as chopped beef in the butcher's case?
Or is the truth that there is a whole lot more flagrant female exhibitionism going on than anyone's ever admitted?
Category: Sex and Culture
Posted on 7/30/2008 7:17:15 PM by Gloria Brame
FOUND: vintage erotic cigar case
Category: Sex and Arts
Posted on 7/30/2008 7:16:17 PM by Gloria Brame
Over the years I've heard omg so many men complain, kvetch, bemoan and otherwise express fear and dissatisfaction with the size of their penis. Sometimes these guys were of perfectly normal size; sometimes they were on the small side. Most of them thought they were small because they compared themselves to porn stars (i.e., men who got jobs in the first place because they had big dicks) or well-hung men they saw at the gym. Every once in a while, though, I hear from some guy who's worried about his dick-size because a woman told him he was small. Sometimes it's a woman who didn't just say he was small but he was TOO small to please her.
In my long and very frisky sexual history I've been with guys of all different sizes, from the almost tragically small to men whose dicks were like engineering miracles. And you know what? If I was turned off by a small dick, it was usually because it was attached to a guy who was a dickhead.
There is no such thing as "too small to please." It's a myth. True, some people have a genetic disorder called micro-penis. You would know immediately if you had this condition because even erect, the penis doesn't get bigger than about 2 inches, 3 inches max. But anything over 4 inches is actually a normal variation on penis size, as is anything under about 8 inches. Higher or lower than that, and you may have issues achieving penetration. In the case of the micro-penis, it's because your bellies and pubic pads interfere; in the case of the gigantically hung, it's because it's hard finding partners who can accommodate you without feeling pain.
Meanwhile, the vagina is a whopping 4" long. That's all. It expands to accommodate larger but it doesn't have to. A well-toned vagina (kegel, kegel, kegel) is happy riding any size dick. Women like finger-fucking, don't they? Well? What does that tell you?
A lot of women, indeed, prefer a modest/average size dick because it's easier to have pain-free penetration with someone on the average to small size. Women don't climax from stimulation to the vaginal canal itself, so reaching every inch of it, while psychologically exciting, is not physiologically necessary for a screaming orgasm.
And while hetero porn selects for the horse-ishly hung, it's interesting to note that gay porn is not nearly as size-oriented. Men who LIKE men like men of ALL sizes. And women who really like men usually do too. Besides, it's a lot easier to deep-throat a dinghy than the Queen Mary.
I think that women who tell men that their dicks are "too" small are man-haters. I'm not, of course, talking about dominatrices who are playing with men's fears, teasing them or feminizing them, and otherwise engaged in some kind of consensual mind-fuck that gets everyone hot. Fact is, even we mind-fucking sadists understand that you don't assault someone's self-esteem for real to gain power over them.
No, what I'm talking about are the castrating (usually vanilla) bitches who know just how to make a man feel like walking shit.
An old boyfriend once told me an apocryphal story about F. Scott Fitzgerald and Ernest Hemingway. Fitzgerald had approached Hemingway, all depressed, and told him that his wife Zelda told him his dick was too small to please her. Hemingway allegedly marched Fitzgerald into his "office" (the men's room), and told Fitzgerald to show him his dick. Hemingway looked at it, and told Fitzgerald to get dressed. Then he opined: "You're perfectly fine. Zelda is trying to destroy you."
And there it is, ladies and gentlemen: from the mouth of a great novelist to your eyes. Fitzgerald's insane and insanely mean wife was, indeed, trying to destroy him.
So take it from me and Papa H: there is no reason why any woman would ever tell a man his dick is too small to please her UNLESS...
Someone who understands Japanese (or, better still, who understands THE Japanese) might be able to explain this but it looks like a warning not to poop on traffic cones to this gaijin.