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Kermit we hardly know ye

Category: Sexual Humor
Posted on 4/15/2008 4:59:48 AM by Gloria Brame

How to hide SM bruises

I like this kind of advice: just practical tips, no judging.

From Dear Doctor Danger, published in a college newspaper.

Dear Doctor,

My boyfriend and I have found that we share a penchant for BDSM. We’re worried that our friends won’t understand our passion, so I’m writing you for help: What is the best way to hide the marks of our violence? I’m especially worried that if I do a bad job people will think he’s beating me . . . uh, which I guess he is.

Anyway, help us, Doctor!

- Punch Drunk Love

Punch,

Once the post-coital glow has faded the first thing you should do is ice any emerging love lumps for 15 minutes or so; that will reduce swelling. To hide discoloration, use liquid or cream corrective concealer and a delicate touch. You should apply opposing hues to neutralize the color of the bruise—yellow and green on fresh blue and red bruises, light green for older brownish-yellow ones.

Apply the concealer from the center of the bruise outward, going a little past the edge. Let it dry; you may want to add a second layer if the first was too light. Otherwise, put a small amount of your usual base on next and smooth the area with a compact puff. For faded and superficial bruises (i.e. nibbles and pinches, as opposed to clothespins and bites), eye shadow and setting powder with a #1 brush can replace the concealer and base. The key in all this is a light touch: If you overdo the concealer or slop on base you might as well throw on a pair of big-ass sunglasses and start telling stories about doorknobs and stairs.

Category: Sex and Sadomasochism
Posted on 4/15/2008 4:58:49 AM by Gloria Brame

Freudian nude to set record

A masterpiece by Lucien Freud - one of my favorite contemporary artists - is predicted to sell for a HUGE amount next month at Christie's.

The most important work by Lucian Freud (b. 1922) to appear at auction is among the leading highlights of Christie’s New York Post-War & Contemporary Art Evening Sale on 13 May 2008. The life-size Benefits Supervisor Sleeping, 1995, depicts a naked Sue Tilley, a benefits supervisor from London, and is estimated between $25 million and $35 million. Appearing at auction for the first time, the work is offered from a private European collection and its estimate reflects that it may establish a new world auction record for any work by a living artist sold at auction. The masterpiece will be on public view for the first time in London at a special exhibition on 11, 14 and 15 April 2008 at Christie’s King Street.
More on Artdaily.org

Category: Sex and Arts
Posted on 4/15/2008 4:57:51 AM by Gloria Brame

FOUND: rubber face

I'm not saying I wouldn't play with this but wow it is CREEEPY.

via Ebay

On the other hand, Mr. Bean is downright scary.

Categories: Post-Modern Pop Culture Sex and Sadomasochism
Posted on 4/15/2008 4:56:52 AM by Gloria Brame

I am judging you. Yes, you.

Wait! Don't look unless you're willing to be haunted by guilt for the rest of your life....

Oops. What did you do?

(image from CuteOverload.com)

Category: Pets and Animal Love
Posted on 4/15/2008 4:55:54 AM by Gloria Brame

Sizing up Michael Phelps in Speedo

The debut of new Speedo swimwear, as modeled by Olympian athletes.

Are they ALL going to be that transparent or is that guy trying to make a point?

Oh. It's his schtick. He sticks his schtick in every shot he takes. Oh.

Well, it's not much of a shtick, but I guess when you are Michael Phelps, it seems bigger.

Categories: Post-Modern Pop Culture Sexual Beauty
Posted on 4/15/2008 4:54:54 AM by Gloria Brame

Erotic Lit: "Yes, Sir" and "Yes, Ma'am"

For those of you who enjoy the verbal arts as much as the visual, two excerpts from recently-published anthologies of SM erotica edited by the prolific Rachel Kramer Bussel. Enjoy (and keep a paper-towel handy).

From
Yes, Ma’am

“A Different Sort of Reality Show”
by D.L. King

The movie I was watching ended but another came on right after it. This one showed a guy attached to a wall, again with an audience. There was only one woman in it. She was beautiful but really mean. You could tell she liked hurting the guy. Like when you watch a horror movie, I couldn’t keep my eyes off her.

“Mmm, Pretty, Pretty. You like that, don’t you?”

I almost hadn’t heard her. No, I didn’t like that. I wasn’t into that sort of thing. I stole a glance at my cock on the screen and saw it bobbing and dancing. They unfastened my wrists and the woman told me I could touch myself. My hands raced to my shaft and started pumping.

“Stop!”

It took me a second, but I managed to stop.

“I’m going to let you come, but I’ll tell you when. There’s a part coming up here that I think you’ll really like. It’d be a shame if you came too soon and missed it, don’t you think?”

They freed my hands. “Press pause on the remote.” They freed my legs and told me to open the drawer in the coffee table. Toys. There were lots of different kinds of toys. There were things in there I had no idea how to use or what they might be meant for.

“Now Pretty, you see that sweet little red butt plug?”

I suppose I hadn’t really been thinking when I looked in the drawer that these were for me to use—on myself! Whoa, butt plug? And it wasn’t “little” either. Somehow, I gave myself away.

“What’s the matter, Pretty, never used one of those? Ooh, I think you’ll like it. Don’t you think he’ll like it, girls?”

Once again, there were choruses of, “Oh yes,” and, “You know it.”

“And besides, it’s always so much fun watching a sweet little anal virgin trying to insert his first plug! Here’s what you’re gonna do, Pretty; you’re going to pick up that bottle of lube and the red plug, close the drawer, and walk around the table so you’re standing between the TV and the table. That’s right. Now, you’re going to bend over and put your hands on the tabletop. Yes, that’s nice. Now, take your hands off the table—no, no, don’t stand up—grab your buttcheeks and spread ’em. We want to see that lovely virgin hole of yours. That’s right.

“Okay, you can let go. Now, squeeze some lube on your right index finger and rub it over your anus. Yes, now, get some more lube and do it again. Push your finger in a little bit. Doesn’t that feel nice?”

And you know what? It did feel good. I wasn’t going to tell her that, but it did kind of turn me on. I’d never done anything like that before. I never thought I’d want to. I mean, I’ve fucked a girl in the ass before and I really liked it, but I never wanted to put anything in my ass. It kind of sent a chill down my spine, into my balls.

---

From
Yes, Sir

“In The Corner”
by Sommer Marsden

“He’s…” I watched Frankie, too, and I suddenly hated him. Hated his quiet, polite ways. His manners. How gentle he was with me in bed. As if I would break. He had never put tiny jeweled clamps on my nipples until I wanted to beg for removal. He had never given me twenty lashings with a whip until my body contorted with pleasure and pain. He had never punished me or spanked me or made me crawl around the house five paces behind him.

But to be fair, Frankie didn’t know my kinks. I hadn’t told him. I didn’t want to. Because Frankie was boring and I was trying to be “normal.”

“An amusement,” Richard finished for me. “He wouldn’t know what to do with you even if you were honest with him.”

“Not everyone is like you,” I said softly. A little fear shot through me at my bold tone. That didn’t stop my body from responding to the malicious smile on his full lips. My body had been well conditioned to respond to Richard at his cruelest. This was nothing. I shifted on the stool, praying it looked as if I were simply uncomfortable.

“True. Very few are like me.” He openly watched me shifting. Grinning even wider, he slid his hand up my thigh, “What’s wrong, Amelia? Are you wet in those proper panties? I bet you are. How wet are you?”

I couldn’t stop him. I don’t think I would have if I could. He slid his hand under the short hem and past my thigh-high hose. He slid a finger under my thong and pushed his big finger into the wetness that pooled there. It happened so fast. And no one saw. No one but me.

My breath solidified in my lungs and I squirmed on the end of his finger. A worm on a hook. A puppet on a string.

“I see. You still soak yourself when you want something.” His mouth was right next to my ear and it sent sparkles of alternating cold and hot along my skin. He bit the top of my ear hard and I felt my cunt constrict around his finger. “And you’re still into the pain,” he laughed. “That hasn’t changed.”

Frankie finally arrived, clutching the beers with a victorious grin. Until he saw where Richard’s hand was. Until he took in my heaving chest and my face, which I could feel was flushed and hot. Still, Frankie was too nice to say anything. Nothing. He looked away, as if to give us time to collect ourselves.

Category: Sex and Arts
Posted on 4/12/2008 9:05:39 AM by Gloria Brame

Erotic Art Friday - 04/11/08: Brett Whiteley

This morning's art show features a wonderful (new to me) Australian artist, Brett Whiteley. As often happens, I stumbled across this highly-regarded painter while researching someone else. His large body of figure studies, erotic drawings and lushly-colored paintings immediately intrigued me. Even his landscapes and abstracts are sensual. Here is an excerpt from his bio.

Brett Whiteley is one of Australia's most revered artists. His lyrical expressionism and lack of inhibition placed him at the forefront of Australia's avant-garde art movement. He won many prizes and awards and his work hangs in numerous galleries, including the National Gallery of Australia in Canberra, the Tate Gallery in London and the Museum of Modern Art in New York.

Read more about Brett Whiteley on Australia's cultural portal

This afternoon I'm going to feature some literary arts -- specifically some excerpts from two new books of SM erotica, generously provided by their editor, Rachel Kramer Bussell. So expect some hot little bits of literary smut later today.

But first: the erotic art of Brett Whiteley.

Category: Sex and Arts
Posted on 4/11/2008 1:41:32 PM by Gloria Brame

Intimations of Immorality

I want to look my best for tomorrow's erotica show

Category: Sex and Arts
Posted on 4/11/2008 1:40:39 PM by Gloria Brame

Auto-erotic steampunk technology toy (for boys)

Hilarious spoof--with a video for your viewing delectation:

Via Gizmodo:

Gadgets: Steampunk Masturbation Device Invented by Internet Anal-Retentive Nerd Guru Merlin Mann

Categories: Sex and Technology Sexual Humor
Posted on 4/10/2008 4:09:05 PM by Gloria Brame

Help for Peyronie's: April 16 live-chat with urologist

And speaking (earlier) of Bill Clinton (ahem)...received a friendly email from a urologist which reminded me of the ex-president's alleged penile dysfunctions.

Hi Gloria,

During your time as a sex therapist, I’m sure you have encountered a relationship affected by Peyronie’s disease. Menshealthpd.com is a website that launched two months ago, dedicated to offering men and their partners information and support in coping with what is truly a “couple’s disease”. The forum has grown to be a place where people speak openly about their experiences with the disease as well as pose questions that can be answered by physicians.

To keep that conversation going, the site is hosting a live chat on April 16th at 8 pm (EST) with Dr. Culley Carson – an urologist who specializes in the treatment of Peyronie’s. This is a great opportunity for people to have their questions about the disease and its treatment options addressed by an expert in the field, so I would love for you to share this event with your readers.

On the homepage, you will see “Participate in the chat on April 16”, I invite both, you and your readers, to learn more about Dr. Carson or submit comments here ahead of time if you can’t make it. Hope to see you there!

Category: Sexual Health
Posted on 4/10/2008 4:08:08 PM by Gloria Brame

Arkansas...oy gevalt

If you missed this story, well....in my heart, I feel this explains a lot about Bill Clinton somehow....you know, like....the lights are on but no one's home?

Toddlers can no longer marry in Ark.

Arkansas' marriage-age crisis is over. A law that mistakenly allowed anyone — even toddlers — to marry with parental permission was repealed by a measure signed into law Wednesday by Gov. Mike Beebe, ending months of embarrassment for the state and confusion for county clerks.

Lawmakers didn't realize until after the end of last year's regular session that a law they approved, intended to establish 18 as the minimum age for marriage, instead removed the minimum age to marry entirely.

Categories: Sex Laws and Crimes Sexual Politics
Posted on 4/10/2008 4:07:09 PM by Gloria Brame

FOUND: the ultimate bathroom tiles

No wonder I spend so much time on eBay...so many uniquely strange sex things you can find. Here's another crafty artsy eBay vendor with a unique markety niche: something to perk up your bath or kitchen...or anywhere you are in need of an EROTIC MOSAIC MARBLE MURAL HANGING ART TILE.

The face could use a little work -- but the important bits look just FINE. And how very thoughtful of the artist to shave the model's balls.

Categories: Post-Modern Pop Culture Sex and Arts
Posted on 4/10/2008 4:06:10 PM by Gloria Brame

FOUND: shifty vulva

There are some mighty creative people out there. This curiosity is being sold by a custom-designer on eBay Motors named, appropriately, BawdyPartz.

For the kinky car fantatic who thought he or she had everything....Be the first one on your block to have an shift knob in the form of a vulva.

You are viewing a magnificent shift knob of the most erotic nature. This is a casting of an original BawdyPartz sculpture meticulously detailed to resemble the most intimate of body parts set in the shape of a seedpod. How fortunate a man, to sow such seeds.

eBay Motors: * Custom Made * Hand Sculpted * Erotic Shift Knob

Categories: Post-Modern Pop Culture Sex and Arts
Posted on 4/10/2008 4:05:12 PM by Gloria Brame

Canada to ponder BDSM rights

Wow, this should be a fascinating case. I congratulate Hayes for his chutzpah in single-handedly forcing a Canadian court to establish whether or not BDSMers deserve equal protection under BC's human rights code. Fantastic courage and if the courts decide in his favor, a victory for BDSMers everywhere.

Panel may rule if sex practices protected

VANCOUVER, British Columbia (Reuters) - A Canadian man who claims he was discriminated against as a pagan who practices a form of sadomasochism will get to take his complaint to a human rights tribunal.

An appeals court rejected a bid by Vancouver police on Tuesday to block a hearing on whether Peter Hayes' rights were violated when an officer refused to grant him the permit he needed to get a chauffeur's job.

Hayes complained to British Columbia's Human Rights Tribunal that he was discriminated against because he is a pagan who practices a "BDSM lifestyle" and deserves protection under the human rights code, based on sexual orientation.

BDSM refers to bondage, discipline and submission and sadism and masochism, according to the court documents.

Police went to the courts, arguing the tribunal and a lower court judge erred in agreeing to hear Hayes' complaint because the laws designed to protect the sexual orientation of gays and lesbians did not extend to protecting types of sexual practices.

A B.C. Court of Appeal panel ruled unanimously that the police motion was premature since the tribunal's hearing was to decide what, if any, sexual practices deserved legal protection, and even the tribunal's chairwoman was unsure if the human rights code did that.

"How can the tribunal determine if BDSM falls within the meaning of 'sexual orientation' if it does not have a full understanding of what BDSM means?" Justice Anne Rowles wrote for the three-judge panel.

Categories: Sex Laws and Crimes Sexual Politics
Posted on 4/10/2008 4:04:13 PM by Gloria Brame

Rich religious pedophilia ring busted: Book 'em, Dano!

So imagine if one day you open the news to read that a cult of wealthy gay men have built an isolated compound in some rural area somewhere, and that in this cult, they took all their sons and sons of friends, and essentially groomed them to be sex partners, starting when they were around 10 or 12?

Or, perhaps slightly more analogously, that a group of swingers had done this: built their own private community, cut off from the rest of the world, and recruited all the children, from age 12 on, into a swing lifestyle where they were forced to provide sex to adults, whether they liked the adults or not?

How many FOX news reporters and talking heads, how many politicians, how many preachers would be commandeering mass media to issue screamingly vicious denunciations of the corruption and depravity of people who would do something so horrible to children as to subject them to lives of brainwashing, abuse, and sexual slavery? How many Christian leaders would step forward to say that this depravity is why God punished us with 9/11 and Katrina?

Well maybe I'm missing something but I have not heard one fracking WORD of invective launched at the fracking dangerous, criminal Mormon sect which has been subjecting girls and women to their psychopathic belief system. Crazier still, no one is coming out to say what is so blindingly obvious: this is a pedophilic cult! They are PEDOPHILES. They like YOUNG girls. They think they OWN young girls. More specifically, they think they own the vaginas of children. Children!

Say all you want about these people who claim this is what God wants -- seems to me awfully convenient when God tells you to rape and molest children in His name. Using that kind of logic, any crack whore can (and perhaps should) form her own religion so she can claim that God wants her to turn tricks so she can smoke more crack.

Documents: Sect married girls at puberty

"Investigators determined that there is a widespread pattern and practice of the (Yearn for Zion) Ranch in which young, minor female residents are conditioned to expect and accept sexual activity with adult men at the ranch upon being spiritually married to them," read the affidavit signed by Lynn McFadden, a Department of Family and Protective Services investigative supervisor.

McFadden said the girls were spiritually married to the men as soon as they reached puberty and were required to produce children.

I hope prosecutors charge them all as child-rapists and sentence them to hard time. And charge the mothers as accomplices too. It's one thing for adults to agree to polygamy. I have no problem with that. Mormons want to return to the old belief of marrying four wives, who cares: as long as the wives are OLD ENOUGH TO GIVE LEGAL CONSENT.

This story outrages me because I don't believe that anyone will treat them for what and who they are -- moral carbuncles on God's ass. Any and all cults which exploit children should be taken down and taken down hard. There is no excuse for pedophilia, and hiding it behind the veil of "spiritual purpose," is a sham, a perversity, and a lie.

Categories: Sex and Spirituality Sex Laws and Crimes Sexual Politics
Posted on 4/9/2008 8:35:34 PM by Gloria Brame

Danes dig gay burials

Interesting concept: some Danes who feel stronger community with their chosen (gay) families than their biological families are now hoping to be buried in a specially-designated gay section of a Danish cemetery.

Gays in Denmark get own cemetery space

Homosexuals have been designated an area in a Copenhagen cemetery for those who want to be buried among people who shared their sexual orientation, one of the project initiators said on Tuesday.

So if you could, would you want to be buried in a sadomasochistic (or leather) graveyard?

Categories: Sex and Culture Sex and History Sex and Spirituality
Posted on 4/9/2008 8:34:38 PM by Gloria Brame

FOUND: Roman-era mosaic dildo

For sale on eBay:

Authentic Roman Glass Mosaic Erotic Penis 300AD

I wonder if this was utilitarian or strictly ornamental. It must've been a rough ride if used for play.

Category: Sex and History
Posted on 4/9/2008 8:33:39 PM by Gloria Brame

Hot and Smoky vintage erotica

A few smoking-related things that intrigued me.

First, a rather interesting leather cigar case. Who says tobacco, water sports and misogyny don't mix? The second image is the reveal.

And speaking of strange pairings, cigarettes and, um, gynecology come together in this cigarette case.

Now this I understand: lingerie and smoking. A combination I've often enjoyed. Good shoes too! ;)

Categories: Sex and Arts Sex and Culture Sex and Sadomasochism
Posted on 4/8/2008 10:52:36 PM by Gloria Brame

FOUND: 1812 lesbians

No, no, that's not an amount. It's an etching dated ca. 1812 by an artist to the court of Napolean Bonaparte.

For sale on eBay now

Category: Sex and Arts
Posted on 4/8/2008 10:51:46 PM by Gloria Brame

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